Home > life, relationships, sexuality > What every gal needs to consider

What every gal needs to consider

So you’ve met Mr Great and settled in together. Wonderful!

And of course you expect him to be monogamous. (and fair enough too!)

But just realise the implications of what you are creating. You are saying to him that you are now the one and only woman on the face of the entire planet that he can kiss, touch, caress, shag, …  (you  get the idea).

You are actually placing an enormous responsibility on yourself.

Imagine if he needed a certain medication that he was unable to self-administer, and you were his nurse. He is now dependent on you. He has no choice in the matter.

If you demand or expect monogamy, you have limited his choices of sexual partner to exactly one! You!

I’ll say it again … You are actually placing an enormous responsibility on yourself.

It is my observation that many woman don’t get this. Don’t get it at all.

Categories: life, relationships, sexuality
  1. July 8, 2010 at 12:59 pm

    Jon,

    I get it, but that understanding did not come easily.

    Libby

  2. kirsten duncan
    July 8, 2010 at 1:38 pm

    I wonder if, in part, this is a consequence of societal conditioning that has (in the past, hopefully less now) told women that by entering into a sexual relationship with a man they are bestowing some amazing blessing on him by ‘giving’ themselves to him. The flip side of that same thought is that sex can be withheld. It’s been reduced to a bargaining chip and means of control. Where is the ownership of a woman’s sexual experiences in that idea? No wonder people still describe womens orgasms in terms of “he gave her an orgasm”. What a crock! It seems to me that one of the reasons that a couples sex life can be a litmus paper for the rest of the relationship is that how we relate to each other sexually is usually a physical expression of how we feel about each other in every other aspect of our relationship e.g. power, control, genuine affection, regard, nurturing, meal ticket, etc. Until we see ourselves as truly equal partners we are doomed to have shitty sexual relationships.

    Btw, I hope that YOU get that your post applies equally in the other direction!

  3. Karen
    July 9, 2010 at 12:29 pm

    Very well said Kirsten….!

  4. November 20, 2010 at 6:00 am

    Monogamy is a choice, a personal choice. It always works out best when it is chosen by both but when it is a condition imposed and demanded of another, then it is a purely selfish act and in no way respectful or considerate or even so much a loving of another.

    A person is not an object to be possessed or enslaved to the emotional needs of another. Most women I talk with do not like this attitude, however, a lot of those women I do not consider Real women but only emotional little girls who have never grown up.

    (hi jon!)

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