My 14 year old daughter asked me “If you are gay or lesbian or bisexual, can you still be a christian?”

My response was to ask her what she meant by gay, and what she meant by christian. Although she seemed reasonably clear that gay meant “you were born liking other guys” she was fuzzy to say the least about this troublesome christian word, giving up after something like “someone who believes is God and tries to live the way the bible says you should.”

I then asked her to pretend she was a christian, and answer the question herself. She proceeded to ask me straight back what the bible said about homosexuality. From this, I asked her if that meant that her basis (as a christian) for determining whether something is right or wrong was “what the bible says”, which got met with a mumbling sort of yes. As for me telling her what the bible says about homosexuality, I pointed out that it isn’t all that clear, as christians from both sides of the fence argue their viewpoint by each quoting different verses at each other (as they do for many other issues). So then I suggested we just pretend that the bible was crystal clear that being gay was wrong - what would she think then? This was greeted with more grumbling as she clearly did not want to agree with this, but also did not want to disagree with the bible.

Finally I asked her how people of other cultures and religions would resolve the same question. So this left her with the questions of not only how do you determine the “correct” message of the bible, but also even if you do, what difference does that make as there are lots of other “bibles” out there. How can she know whether or not the bible can be trusted as divinely authoritative, or whether it is just another religious book devised by man.

After all this which was way more thinking than she was expecting, she decided to leave it at that.

What would you say to her?

Above all, you are not to ask such logical questions as “If God wanted strict obedience to His laws, why did He create the possibility of those laws being violated?” Ah, your teachers tell you - because God wanted you to have “free choice”. Yet what kind of choice is free when to choose one thing over another brings condemnation? How is “free will” free when it is not your will, but someone else’s which must be done? Those who teach you this would make a hypocrite of God.
(quoted from Conversations with God, Book 1, p62)

When I first read these words I was astonished that I had never made this self-evident observation for myself. But of course I had no choice but to ignore its obvious truth, otherwise my whole christian house of cards would have to come tumbling down. To be quite honest, sometimes I am so overwhelmed with gladness to have finally broken free from the tyranny of christian fundamentalism that I feel like weeping for joy.

A few years ago I decided to certify in the Microsoft Windows Server 2000 products and spent 8 months studying many volumes all about this product. Many times I would experience an inner thrill as the lights switched on in my mind as I realised what they were on about and how a particular component actually worked.

It’s a great feeling. The joy of learning and discovery. The delight that comes with understanding.

It’s the same feeling David had as he studied the Hebrew law and delighted in learning and discovering its wisdom and its message for him.

The past year I have been reading and re-reading (and re-reading!) the three books of the trilogy “Conversations With God” and almost every time  I read I feel a delicious welling-up of joy as my soul and mind respond to its simple message. While I don’t agree with every word that is written in its pages, I love the overall message of the book and I embrace it as my own. It has become a “lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path” and I am grateful that this message has been given to mankind at this time.

 A few years ago, a friend of mine Christine was working in HR and was dreading the job of having to tell two staff that they would be losing their jobs. One was an older woman nearing retirement, so Christine imagined that she would be happy to simply take early retirement. The other however was a younger man, recently married and two small kids. Christine felt so bad for him and the hardship this job-loss would place on him and his family.

The big day arrived, and the two meetings were held.

The young man was first, and responded to the news with a wide smile and delight. His wife had just got a great new job, and he was glad to get out of this job, become a house-husband, and finally finish the alterations on the garage.

Next was the older woman, who became so enraged by the news that she grabbed a pencil off the desk and attacked Christine, stabbing her in the thigh.

Each person chose their own reaction, their own experience of this situation, and in doing so both revealed and determined Who They Are. 

Why do so many people admire Ozzy Osbourne, when you could easily argue that he has done nothing but fry his brains on drugs and set a bad example for an entire generation?  My feeling is that he is admired because people recognise that he has “lived himself out to the full”, and that this is the inate desire of each soul - to fully express and experience itself. It seems to me that this is why prison is such a terrible punishment because it denies the soul the usual multitude of opportunities to express and experience itself.  

This is surely the chief aim of man: to express and experience Who We Really Are.

I found myself thinking about this comment from Jesus (as recorded in the gospels) and I find it quite a remarkable thing for him to have said. Rather than “God has healed you because of your faith in Him”, or something along those lines, Jesus is saying to this person that it is simply their faith that has healed them.

Following on from some of the New Age I’ve been reading, this would be interpreted somthing along the lines of saying that “because you have known it as true, it is true.”

I was watching the business bit of the news the other day and was amazed at all of the financial gobble-de-gook they found to talk about. Share markets going up and down. Exchange rates. The strength of the dollar. I hope they realise that none of this is actually real - we have made it all up!

A few days ago I was wandering through our local shopping mall and I bumped into a member of my former church. He knew I had “fallen away” and so used the opportunity to enthusiastically tell me (again) of how he had been miraculously healed by Jesus a few years back.

In his mind, this was a clear proof that what he believes is the truth.

In my mind, this was clear proof that what he believes is a truth.

I have not posted anything new on this blog for 3 months now!

The main reason relates to why I ever started this blog at all, which was as a way of me venting first my frustrations with the church, then my exploration of “post-church” christianity, and finally moving to a “post christian” position following my discovery of the “Conversations with God” books. All of these processes gave me a lot to punch and kick about, hence this blog.

The fact that I have not posted anything recently is simply because I have finally found a new resting place now that the dust has settled, and I am no longer in a place of struggle and conflict. This process has taken about 1 year, and the process of deconversion from fundamentalist christianity has been one of the most difficult things I have ever done in my life.

To anyone who is struggling and battling with life, whatever your religion or creed, I encourage you to read “Conversations with God” Book 1 as it may be just the right thing for you to get out of the “rut of small thinking” that you are locked into, and open up whole new ways of thinking about your life that you do not even realise are available to you.

It worked for me. 

Once I finally got this unruly lot to get onto the actual topic of the evening (that took about an hour), the question we considered was “how do we decide or judge what is right or wrong?”, and the answers boiled down to a surprisingly simple set of ideas (for the record, all the other bits and bobs we discussed were also wonderfully interesting):

1) Does doing this (having an affair, stealing, lying, whatever) make an accurate statement of Who I Am? Does it express a grander version of myself and who I aspire to be?

2) Am I prepared to accept the consequences of this action?

3) If I be still and listen to my heart, my feelings will tell me the truth. Call it conscience or whatever you want, in reality if we are prepared to admit it the fact is we “know” darn well whether or not what we are doing is right by listening to our own heart.

So there you have it. Another of the great questions of life the universe and everything solved for you all.